Sometimes life feels like a constant game of catch up, and I’m always on the losing side.
I keep wishing I had time to blog, to catch up on all our life’s happenings. I’ve been sick for the last week, and so I’m catching up on dishes, laundry, and housework too. And I’m still trying to kick this nasty bug that keeps lingering in my sinuses and chest. So instead of a real post, filled with pictures, you get this: a post in which I blather about whatever comes to mind so I can feel like I tried, cross blogging off my list, and go to bed feeling a little bit better about myself.
I thought I would have so much more time for blogging now that Grant is back to doing schoolwork. Who was I kidding? It’s just like the last time he was in school. Even though he helps me with getting kids to bed, Phaedra refuses to be satisfied by snuggling Daddy. She only wants Mommy. So after I put Curtis to bed, even though Grant has already been in with the girls telling them stories and snuggling them, I have to go snuggle Phaedra (and for equality sake, I have to snuggle Eleanor too—wouldn’t want anyone to feel like I play favorites, now would we?).
While I’m in with the girls, Grant works on homework. It takes me a while to get Phaedra, a.k.a. Beelzebub, to settle down and be quiet. Sometimes I have to make several trips back into Curtis’s room to soothe him because she has woken him up. She knows we hate it when she wakes him up, and she uses it as her favorite weapon. Once I’ve snuggled her and Eleanor, we can only hope they stay in bed and stay quiet. We’ve had a lot of challenging nights lately.
By the time I get done with kids and they are actually settled, I have to make sure we cleared the table after dinner and sometimes I have to start a load of laundry washing before I can relax (oops, forgot to do that tonight). By the time I sit down on the couch, my brain is fried, I’m exhausted, and I’m not ready to do anything productive like post to my blog. I have to work up to it. So I check e-mail, read a book, or do anything else me-related that I feel so starved to do sometimes. Yes, Pinterest is very often on that list, although Pinterest just makes me feel bad about myself because it adds to the eternal list of things I wish I had time to do and shows me hoards of people who are actually finding time to do it.
By the time I finally get around to even thinking about blogging, Grant has had his fill of homework and is asking me what show I want to watch with him. Sometimes, when I’m too engrossed in what I’m doing, he goes ahead and starts a show whether I’m ready or not. I don’t begrudge him doing that because he knows we have to get started with our TV time by a certain hour or we’ll be up too late which leads to Mommy being a crazy lady. And we do so need that time together. Even if we’re both too spent to actually do much interacting, we get to be two adults alone together without interruption, and we get to be close to each other. I don’t know what I would do without that time with my husband.
I guess the point of all this is that I haven’t given up. And if you are one of the few people out there who still actually read my blog, I hope you don’t give up on me either. I’m trying.
Now Grant has the remote out (the one Curtis chewed a button off of while I wasn’t looking today), so I’d better wrap this up. Thanks for listening (reading).
Have you ever thought about putting fans in the kids rooms? It works wonders as white noise (I always point it away from them so it's not too drafty while they are sleeping) We've always done it, and never had to worry about them waking each other up because of it. Or us waking them up accidently after bed time.
ReplyDeleteI hear you on not enough time to do things, I rarely blog anymore either..one day! :)