{Backtracking –January 28, 2010}
There’s a new monster in our house.
Sorry you have to listen to me laugh through the whole thing. I just can’t help myself.
A new monster was born in our house the other night during an innocent game of “Mighty Martha.” Eleanor calls it the Snow Monster. There’s no explaining where she comes up with these things. I love how they look like they’re really being eaten. Yes, I am a mom who loves watching her children being eaten by monsters. Don’t you judge me!
I feel like I should be blogging. I have wanted to blog more often. I just don’t feel like posting pictures because all my pictures look horrible (if only to me). See, we had some issues with our laptop, so some technicians came and switched out a bunch of the parts to my laptop. One of those parts was the monitor. After a while, I realized there was something wrong with the new monitor. We tried and tried to calibrate it, but that didn’t fix it. Everything is over saturated –way too much color! We called them about it, and they are sending technicians to replace almost every part of my laptop besides the hard drive and monitor (because the problem they set out to fix in the first place is still a problem).
“What? They aren’t going to replace that lemon of a monitor?” you ask.
Nope. They think something might have happened to the GPU, so they’re replacing that instead. They had better be right! We also have to reinstall the OS to see if there was some corruption causing the problem. Meanwhile, I can’t edit photos for my photography homework, and I have no desire to post new pictures to the blog, not knowing how they’ll really look on a decent monitor. (Grumble) Also, there’s no point in saving photos on the hard drive since we’re going to have to relocate all our files to start over anyway. I’m rather frustrated with the situation, and I hope it is all resolved soon.
I also haven’t blogged quite as much as I would have because I’ve been floundering around with file types. People in my class made me worry that JPEGs weren’t the best option. So, I switched to RAW files, I’ve been downloading and converting to DNGs, dealing with XMPs, and saving as PSDs. Basically, I’ve been trying to organize it all, decide which is the best method, and trying to keep back-up copies somewhere at the same time. It’s left me feeling rather dizzy. I’m still not sure if I’m doing it the best way or in a way I’ll be able to keep straight in my head, but I’m working on it.
I took a ton of pictures for my various photography assignments over the weekend. We actually had decent weather and a little bit of time when I wouldn’t have to be the only one dealing with the kids. I’ve mostly used the kids and my own family as subjects for my photography for my assignments because they are what mean something to me. They are what make me want to take better pictures; they’re the whole reason I’m doing this. I want to capture these little moments, expressions, and phases that are so fleeting. Kids grow up so fast. I can’t count the times that I’m watching my girls and just wishing I could gather up some of the feelings and sights I have right at that moment and put them in a jar to save for a healthy dose of sentimentality someday. But I’m starting to feel like I should branch out a bit for my class. I know that pictures of my kids don’t hold much artistic appeal unless they’re done really well. I really only like taking pictures with people in them, and my family are the people who are most readily available to me. I have a hard time taking pictures of landscapes or still life. I don’t think I have an eye for it. I suppose that’s why I ought to practice it more.
I printed a copy of this picture of the girls on the fancy printers they have at school, and I’ve had it in our family room for a few days. I have loved looking at it, and I even got a little teary-eyed one day because I realized how much Grant has given me. He gave me two beautiful daughters who bring me so much joy, and then, as I have expressed the desire to be able to capture them with more quality, he has supplied me with an amazing camera, lenses, and a tripod. I am still learning, but I am getting such better images of my sweet children. Each time I look through some of my favorite photos, I am so grateful for such a caring and generous husband.
While I am on the subject, I wanted to post about this so I would remember. In January, at the end of a very awful week, Grant handed me a bag and told me he knew it had been a really rough week for me and the kids, and he knew it was hard on me when there are times he isn’t home as much (we’ve decided I’m a quality time “love language” type of gal). In the bag was an unopened copy of Photoshop CS4. We had talked about getting Photoshop Elements since it was more affordable, but we hadn’t made any decisions. Grant was able to avoid spending money on an expensive computer program for one of his own classes, so he used the money he saved to surprise me. Having the program at home has also allowed me to skip out on my late night photography lab most of the time so I can come home to him earlier. I love Grant. He. Gets. Me.
{backtracking 10-29-09}
She has been begging Grant forever to go to work with him. When he leaves in the morning, she begs him to take her with him. When we visit him at work, she tells me I can go home without her. She tells me not to worry, that she will be good for Daddy. At first, Grant said he should check into if they have a bring your daughter to work day, but she kept asking. Grant decided he would have to just take a day off and go into the office with her, and since she was asking him about it more and more frequently, he didn't delay. She got to go to work with Daddy. She kept busy, helping him "work hard." She even met the president of the college. She didn't get bored, and any time I would call to check on her, she would tell me, "I don't need to come home yet." Grant took some pictures of the big day. I'll have to post them soon.
Phaedra has grown up so much lately. She now insists on standing on the stool in the bathroom just like Eleanor does. After several scuffles, I moved the less-used stool from our other bathroom into the main bathroom so they each have a stool on which to stand. She stands up there, barely able to reach her chin over the counter, and she brushes her teeth back and forth the way she sees us do it. She wants me to hold her up to spit in the sink just like Eleanor does. She reaches to rinse her toothbrush off when I turn on the water (of course, after rinsing, she slurps the water off the toothbrush).
The jeans she’s wearing in this picture are 18month. There only barely a little long, but the mostly look like they fit. I can’t believe it. I don’t think Eleanor actually wore those jeans until she was almost two. More and more I am realizing lately that she’s not a little baby anymore.
One of my goals this year was to do crafts for my family (at least one a month). I already messed that up for January, so I’m hoping to get more than one thing done this month. We’ll see.
I’ve been meaning to blog about my new table. When we had my family over for dinner on Christmas Eve, it occurred to me that our small table would be rather cramped with everyone trying to sit around it. When I mentioned my concern to my mother, it was the straw that broke the camel’s (Gary’s) back. This table had been in their garage for some time, and Gary had been using it for a drawing table. He really didn’t need a table that big, and my mother had been trying to convince him to give it to us. Long story short, we traded him for our smaller table, and we got this lovely table and chairs. Eleanor has been thrilled not to have to worry about the chairs folding underneath her anymore, and Phaedra has been climbing onto the chairs and table since we got it. Keeps me on my toes!
We had a nice Valentine’s celebration. Studio Grandma and Grandpa offered to take all the kids and do a little party with them on Saturday night. Even though I was sick and sniffly, Grant and I went out to dinner, to a store, and went and got hot chocolates. Grant brought me flowers after work on Friday. I usually take pictures of flowers he gives me so I can hold the memory longer, but between feeling a bit burnt out on photography and exhausted by this cold, I haven’t been able to bring myself to take pictures. They’re pretty, and it was so sweet of him to surprise me. He always treats me so well.
I just love all her curls.
Phaedra is talking, talking, talking! She repeats so many words we say, and she’s starting to put together two words. She says, “Get it,” among other things. Some of her favorites lately include: band-aid, Eleanor (I LOVE how she says Eleanor), dance, nap, pretzel, cracker, church, nigh-night, medicine . . . it’s hard to make a list now, because she repeats everything we say.
We’ve been practicing the Articles of Faith with Eleanor. Phaedra has heard it so many times. When I asked Eleanor the other day to tell me her Article of Faith, Phaedra started out, “We believe . . .”
Phaedra is getting more and more insistent on being independent. She often finishes eating quickly but wants to beg food off of us once she’s out of her chair. She tries to insist on feeding herself even when she’s in your lap mooching messy food. It only took her a few times throwing a fit with her daddy to find out that she doesn’t get any food if she insists on doing it herself.
The past week or so, Phaedra has been making herself heard. She screams like a banshee when she is upset with what is happening. I think she learned it from the way Eleanor screams when Phaedra steals her toys. She knows better, though. When she screams at me over something she wants, I tell her to use her words, and she immediately (and a bit more slowly if she’s really angry) says please.
Phaedra will eat just about anything that involves peanut butter. And when she’s done eating it, she puts it in her hair, of course. She also loves pretzels, yogurt covered raisins, and yogurt.
She likes toast (with peanut butter), and when the toaster pops, she says, “Pop!” until you go get it ready for her. She also tries to say, “Lolli- lolli- lolli-pop!” (You can mostly only understand the pop part, though.)
Phaedra is a very snuggly, loving girl. She loves to be in my lap. When she wakes up too early in the morning, she snuggles me in bed. She has to be situated so her shoulder is pressed tightly under my chin. She gives pat-pats and kisses. She winks (blinks both eyes); she’s been winking at me when I pull out the camera lately.
Phaedra will be nursery age next month. Many people assume that my only emotion concerning that transition would be one of celebration. This is just another way that I’m an odd mom, I guess. (Note: I don’t have any problem with moms who are excited to put their children in nursery, nor do I think they are wrong to feel that way.) Sure, she’s getting to be a real handful at church, but that doesn’t mean I’m itching to get rid of her. I get so addicted to my kids. This age is SO fun. I love watching her grow and express herself. She is really seeming to have some separation anxiety with me lately. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been getting out more or if it’s just the age. I’ve taken her into nursery a few times so she can get a feel for it, and she watches me like a hawk, crying if I seem like I will leave. I love the women who work in the nursery, and I respect them. It’s still hard for me because I know Phaedra doesn’t know them very well, and even though I can tell them to bring her to me if she’s having a hard time, there are all different perceptions of a child having a hard time. It’s hard for me to trust that they will know when she has hit her limit and take the time to come get me. I just want her to have a good experience.
In contrast, this was never an issue with Eleanor because she was so excited about playing with other kids and different toys that she didn’t care so much when we left her. Eleanor was more sensitive, getting her feelings hurt easily, so I really didn’t expect that Phaedra would be the one to have trouble going to nursery. I guess we’ll see how it all goes in a month.
There is a group of about five kids going into nursery right around the same time. That nursery is going to be HUGE. We’re going to a special play date with just those kids toward the end of this month that should be really fun.
Phaedra has all her molars cut through the gums, and last I checked, most of them were all the way in, with only a little bit of gums still covering the top ones. She’s been working on her canines. Her top ones have cut through, but they are taking their time coming in.
Phaedra loves books. She started acting too jealous of Eleanor who got to sit with Daddy at bedtime and listen to stories while I put Phaedra to bed. So, we started letting her hang around for stories until she got too restless before I took her to bed. The last few nights, we have put the girls to bed at the same time, and so far, we have actually had success. We couldn’t dream of doing that in the beginning because they kept each other up. I think they’ve both come a long way where sleep is concerned. Phaedra has had some rough nights when she has gotten up, but I think they have mostly been because of teeth.
Phaedra went potty on the potty once during the month. (She was in the tub, and I saw her starting to push and hurried to get her onto the potty.) Now, she tells me “potty” most of the times she goes in her diaper. Sometimes, she gets really insistent that I put her on the potty to let her try, but she has usually already gone in her diaper. It’s her new obsession, though.
She’s a busy little girl, and she certainly keeps us busy. We love her.
Giving loves and pat-pats.
Phaedra used to squawk most of the times Eleanor tried to hug her, but she’s getting better about it. She even randomly decides to go give Eleanor a hug sometimes. I just love it when they’re sweet to each other.
Such sweet sisters.
I got this one while I was trying to get an artsy depth of field shot for my photography class. I didn’t end up using this one, but I still like it.
Grant and I have reached a new height in our communication.
We always head to our room at the same time to brush teeth and go to bed. The past few nights, I’ve found that these times are a wonderful opportunity for quality communication. As soon as Grant has mouthwash in his mouth and is starting to swish, I quickly babble off anything on my mind that would otherwise cause him to tell me I’m crazy or say, “I told you so.” Then, if he looks too tempted to comment, I barricade the sink so he can’t spit. I know our marriage is more healthy because of my efforts to share with my husband :)
(Eleanor saw me open the draft of this post and recognized her name at the top. She told me I had to spell Kathleen, because she’s Eleanor Kathleen.)
She’s going to have to learn not to turn her back on me to play in the mud while I’m taking pictures :)
Here’s a smattering of info about Eleanor (minus anything I can’t remember at the moment).
Eleanor pronounces words very well, but no matter how many times I tell her, she still calls lemons melons.
While riding in the car lately, Eleanor has asked me several times to participate in pretending we are in a carriage.
For some time now (more than several months), Eleanor has had the same request anytime someone reads her a story. She sits next to them, as close as possible, and asks, “May I please be in?” That’s her way of asking you to put your arm around her while you read the story. Eleanor loves to be in. Her parents love it, too.
The other day, I asked her for a kiss. When she gave me a kiss on the cheek, I asked her if I could have a kiss on the lips. She said, “I don’t do that anymore.” I asked her why, and her response was, “Because I’m too far from Jesus right now.”
Eleanor loves to talk about Jesus. She’ll tell us random facts about him (many of them made up). She also likes to point out that he loves all of us, even when we make bad choices. The other day, she told my mother that bad guys love Jesus. We told her we weren’t too sure about that one.
One morning, Eleanor came into the kitchen where I was prepping breakfast and laughed. She said, “Jesus is funny. He made Daddy a boy and all of us girls. Jesus is funny.”
Eleanor does really well with Phaedra. They really seem to have a loving relationship as far as siblings their age can. They’re both fairly good at sharing with each other (especially when asked to do so). I love watching them together when they are at their best.
They certainly like to work together when they gang up on Mommy. Their latest game is to steal the clean socks as I’m putting away laundry and make me chase after them.
Eleanor just loves the moon. We liked the way it looked the other day on our way home from the park, so I stopped and took a picture. She has always loved the moon. She points it out the first time she sees it in the evenings as if she rarely gets to enjoy such a sight. Maybe when she’s older, I’ll tell her the myth about the man in the moon who is there to listen to your troubles, but right now, I want her get used to prayer serving that purpose (and her loving parents, of course).
I know I do a lot of these. It just shows my lack of creativity and adventure. Once I know how to make something, I don’t mess with what works. I just stick with what I know. I blame it on not having enough time to try something new, but it’s probably because I don’t make enough time. Okay, if I’m on a big honesty kick, it’s because I’m a perfectionist, and trying something new means it might not turn out how I want it.
I made this for a baby shower gift for my friend Julia. She finally got her sweet baby boy, Jaron, right before Christmas. I am so happy for her!
